The Miscellaneous Ramblings Of A Saved Soul

Tuesday, April 3, 2007

Things People Actually Said in Court Word per Word.

Things People Actually Said in Court Word per Word…

From the book "Disorder in the Court"
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Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
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Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began
the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
A: It is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.
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Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
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Q: Did he kill you?
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Q: Sir, what is your IQ?
A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think.
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Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female?
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Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?
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Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
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Q: Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?
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Q: Did you blow your horn or anything?
A: After the accident?
Q: Before the accident.
A: Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it.
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Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?
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Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.
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1 comment:

Cathie Brown said...

Hi Rob
I've heard this before a number of times and it still makes me laugh, so thanks for showing it.

You wrote in a comment on my blog about 2 weeks ago asking if I could help. Would you let me know exactly what help you need and if I can, I will.
Keep Shining!
Cathie
www.breezeblogs.com/GuestHouse.php